 |  |  |  |
 |  |  |  |
Friday, April 25, 2008
...
It has been a busy year -- but suddenly i feel restless-- and if I know myself-- it can never be good, this restlessness-- it always leads to trouble-- dissatisfaction- the where am I headed, question. Major upheavals in life have resulted from this. I feel trapped -- trapped in what, I don't know. All the chains are of my own making and all of them readily worn... I have shed entanglements to stay this way.. but a new chain is wearing me down.. part of me tells me this is what it is to be grown up -- but somehow-- it irks me.
commitment phobia was alien to me -- I committed, with joy and it scratched my soul to bits -- I must have been seeking something, I tell myself. The tattered soul convinced me that whatever I needed was mine to give-- mine to allow-- and then I stopped.
this latest act of commitment seems unnatural -- it is weighing me down --
there is a fight within -- will i stay or will i leave?
time will tell i guess.
commitment phobia was alien to me -- I committed, with joy and it scratched my soul to bits -- I must have been seeking something, I tell myself. The tattered soul convinced me that whatever I needed was mine to give-- mine to allow-- and then I stopped.
this latest act of commitment seems unnatural -- it is weighing me down --
there is a fight within -- will i stay or will i leave?
time will tell i guess.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)