Time

A little over eight years ago, I started working for a software firm. It was the pre-dot-com era and I was glad to be finally doing what I loved doing anyway and getting paid for it. I loved my job. Thru the ups and downs of my life this one thing has been constant. Almost.

In the last couple years I have seen the stirrings of the seven year itch. This is not the job I loved, everywhere I look I see mediocrity and politics... coming into work is not a rush anymore and I do not long for my vacation to end so that I can go back to work.
What happened to it? Did I just get bored? Is it mid-life crisis? Or did the world at work really change?

I see so many people complain about the workplace.. most of them are just bitter 20-something 'grass is greener on the other side of the fence' complaints. Complaints of how people had it good 10-15 years ago and they could make easy millions by joining some software company and how they have been robbed of the opportunity ... basic complaints about having to work hard for the millions now.

But, I see things around me that I don't like, the firm is getting fat in the middle... Too much management and not enough people doing real work ... and most of the middle-management is pitiful anyway. Unhappy, scared, de-motivated, de-moralized people, not enough leadership in everyday life. Bad product strategy ... higher ups not in touch with reality and then the 'spin'-- for everything. Too much politics and not enough 'lets fix it.

This is not the place I started at... I was a green college grad student, who felt like she had finally come home. People were smart and worked hard. Nothing was impossible or too hard, there was integrity and fun. I loved it. I could walk down the hall to talk to the guy who wrote the API and have him tell me how and sometimes even acknowlege, my way of doing something was better than his original design.

I have given this place eight years and it has given me a lot back in return, a place to learn and grow, contribute to the world with what I do, a fat paycheck and a fatter benefits packet, friends and co-workers who are like my family now.

I have fought with people on why it is not the evil empire and why it is a great place to work.. why the review model and the curve are not arbitrary, how the interviews need to be that long. Folks tell me I have been drinking the company cool-aid too long:) but I just believe in a lot of these things that form the foundation of this place. I have seen really good managers who have used the tools of recruiting and reviewing in ways to promote happy and healthy teams. There is nothing really wrong with the system, every system can be used in ways that are counter to the principles that created it. Quoting Warren Buffet, Three things to look for in people you hire, they should be honest, hardworking and smart. The first two being essential, without which the third one actually becomes dangerous.

I read in JWZ's blog a long time ago, when he quit netscape he said, there are two kinds of people, people who make a company successful, and the kind of people who want to work for a successful company. I do believe the place I work for is now getting heavier in people of the second category. Sad as it sounds, this is not home anymore. Will I stay and try to fix my home or will I quit? Time will tell, I guess.